Hello all, long time no talk to, or hear from, huh? I checked and it’s been less than two months, since I wrote the same type post. I wonder what that means. In any event, I know you’ve been wondering what I’m up to, since I haven’t been regularly posting over the past few weeks. Well, you do know my first reason had to do with finishing that manuscript. Now, I guess the only excuse I can give is that life has gotten in the way. What is it that John Lennon said: “Life is what happens to you while you’re busy making other plans.” I haven’t been so busy making….uh, well….actually, I guess I have been. But, let me tell you, life really has grabbed hold of my collar, and is slapping me silly. Although, I am experiencing a lull at the moment. Imagine entering a building – one that you’ve absolutely never been near. You open the outside door, walk through and the entire area is filled with fog. Now, you must stand there and wait for it to clear before you can get an inkling of which direction you need to go. I’m certain if you’ve lived long enough, you’ve had one of these experiences. Believe me, age will teach you to wait; not make a sound, and definitely do not move.
To make it a little clearer, I guess I’ve reached a point in my writing career, where I’m questioning if I really have one. In fact, questioning it, yet again. Back on January 1st I heard a word that said to me, this would be a “break it or make it year.” And yes, after so many behind me – I would definitely hope so. I have tried, won, lost, almost given up, even though the flame never died. Then, someone came along and added a touch more fuel, which turned the flicker back in to a real fire again. So, here we are at the end of April, and I can’t even feel my way along, because of this dense fog. Therefore, I took a seat on the floor, and quietly awaited a tap on the shoulder or a whisper in my ear. But then, what happened? Life, whipped the door open, and snatched me out for the next round. When this one is over, I’ll wind up sitting on the floor again waiting, because through it all and if nothing else, I know I’ve entered the correct building. I’ve also realized that after three years, there is a possibility I shouldn’t be blogging. However, I will have to, in order to keep anyone interested up to date, yes? So, I’ll continue on with this phase of the movement, for now.
I’ve checked out other blogs, and people who make the “Top 10” list in this game. Although, that is great for them, that is not my calling. I began this as a way of introducing myself. I don’t want to say I’ve lost interest, but this is simply a by-product of my real goal – serious writing. It has become increasingly difficult to find something to write about that’s interesting, which says to me, I need a course correction. Even though, I don’t know the slightest idea what that should be other than my novels. Let me ask, have you searched for anything on Google or Bing lately? There is a sea of blogs having to do with absolutely everything. If I think back, I remember a time when only the professionals or experts wrote of things. Nowadays, Charley around the corner, and Susie up the block have written something on “How To.” Don’t expect that here. What I mean is, many of those men and women do not have degrees on their topics of discussion. They’re just out there. So, to sum it all up – life, waiting and a bit of disorientation are the order of my days for the present. I think it’s silly to produce pieces, or give opinions on things that no one has any interest in, am I right? I can continue to produce news articles, or talk about happenings in life, but my gut tells me I’m plotted for another course and as my reader, you deserve my best.
At times through life, things will tug at you. I don’t know if you remember, but I’ve mentioned this before. My mother explained it to me as a kind of “calling.” She said it worked in the same way a Priest or Minister understands what they’re supposed to do – whatever it is, it won’t let them be – what they are called to will continue to pop in their minds. It will happen day and night until they give in, and get it done. For me, it began with the books, then, I became pushed in the direction of supplying pieces for my Chapter newsletters. From there, working for the newspaper kept bugging me, followed by the need to start this website. Although, I am in a lull, I believe it’s a necessary one – a calm that on the other end will bring with it another calling – something that I already sense I’ll want to protest. In fact, I may have some idea, and, yes, I’ve already began my objections with, “How do I do that?” But, like always through the kicking and screaming, day and night it’s not going to let me be. Then, like the Priest, or the Minister – no, let me use a more appropriate character. Who remembers the story of Jonah, when he ran from God? In the end, it became pretty comical when he told God, “You already knew what would happen,” I paraphrase, of course. But, just like that, I’ll break and give in. When will I ever learn that what God wants is always what I’ll be most satisfied doing. It’s never about what we want. Regardless He never takes us in reverse; He will always push you forward. Again, thanks for lending me your ear, and please hang in there with me on my journey of discovery.
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