The Funny Side of Falling

3969212_sI have been trying to remember what brought up the topic of falling hubbie and I had the other day.  But, after we began talking about it, I decided it might make for an interesting blog post.  When I think back, as children we fell all the time; from swings, the monkey bars, and my favorite involved spinning on gravel with my bike, which many times landed me on my knees.  But, children have no fear of anything.  Of course, as we age, and even age more, this little event becomes terrifying.  Our parents or grandparents falling can easily mean the difference in life, and death – healing quickly, or lying in bed for months waiting for a hip, or an arm to mend itself.  But, as a middle adult and for those of us in the regular world, you know, we who aren’t thrill seekers; this is quite an embarrassing occurrence.

As you all may know, hubbie runs a pet sitting business.  A couple of months ago, he went to take care of a dog belonging to some new clients. This huge Great Dane had yet to acclimate itself to him.  (If you remember, I said this usually is not a concern, but one dog in ten has a slow gene).  Anyway, he hurriedly leashed the dog, because it had a tendency to bolt.  As he brought him down the few steps from the house in to the garage, and the minute he became distracted, the dog did just that – bolted.  Hubbie missed the last two steps, and bam!  He went right to the concrete, while wearing his sunglasses.  Needless to say, those glasses left their mark in the form of a gash on his forehead.  They also took out a large chunk from his nose, and let’s just say there were bruises and contusions everywhere else.  Funny thing, the animal knew that it had hurt him. After it took off- somewhere along the way it stopped, made a u-turn, and went back to the garage where it cowered, and licked the wounds it had caused. Just, too sweet, right?  I could not believe my eyes when hubbie returned home, looking like a Frankenstein experiment, gone horribly wrong.  I mean, I love the man, but it’s been a couple of months now, and he still bears the scars.

Then, there’s another type of funny adult tumbling. I had a friend many years ago come back in the office after lunch, shaking like crazy.  When I asked her what happened, she told me she fell at the corner, outside the office.  The most hysterical thing about this kind of fall is they usually take place around people.  You lift your foot to place it on the curb, and miss, or trip and there you are on your knees. So, instead of someone running over to help, all you hear is laughter, and snickering. Because you’re so mortified, all you can do is pick yourself up, dust off, and hurry on your way.  The only thing to heal that wounded self-esteem is time.  Of course, on every other trip outside, it becomes mandatory you walk in the other direction – at least for the next week or two.

Now, the next kind of fall is terrifying as it’s happening, but now that I can tell the story, it is pretty funny.  You knew I’d have to include myself, yes?  Anyway, for those of you who have never been in or near the Seventh Avenue entrance to Madison Square Garden/Pennsylvania Station in Manhattan, there are stairs and then, to the far right (north) is an escalator.  Since I came from the south side of Seventh Avenue, I always took the stairs, being that’s what I hit first. I did this everyday for two years, making my way to the subway, and home to Queens.  There are probably somewhere around twelve or fifteen steps with steel plating and steel lips at the front edge of each step.  I can’t say if it happened due to my heel or just that steel lip.  But, on this particular day, a piece of my high heel got caught on that lip.

Here I am – tons of people, everyone moving, and going their own way.  When you begin to fall, what is the first human response – you reach for something to break it, yes?  Now, not being at the side edge of the steps where I could grab hold of the railing, when I started falling I had to do it right in the middle of the moving crowd.  What happens next – time S – L – O – W – S, yes?  So, here I go; F – O – R – W – A – R – D.  My right hand goes out, instinctually, but in S – L – O W     M – O – T – I – O – N.  Then, right to the nap of the guy’s shirt two steps down, and in front of me.  The poor guy is grimacing while being yanked backward, but I must hold on for my life to avoid flattening my face on the quickly approaching concrete.  Imagine how embarrassing, when you finally regain control of your actions.  Because, then I had to help the poor stranger straighten his clothes while I apologized in every way I could think.  And, this didn’t even turn in to one of those “meet cutes,” I had to just endure, and then, say good-bye.  Have you ever taken an unintentional fall as an adult? Come on, I shared.

4 thoughts on “The Funny Side of Falling

  1. I’m extremely accident-prone, so I generally avoid stairs and escalators. I don’t wear flip-flops in busy places, either. It is inevitable that the bottom of my shoe will get stepped on. And I still trip myself up on nothing at all. While falling in public is awful, I find the experience much worse when I’m wearing a dress/skirt. So, if it’s going to happen, I just pray I’m wearing pants.

    • You’re right, it is certainly not funny as it is happening – but, the cliche “time heals all wounds” is very true. You never forget, but you can for sure look back and laugh at yourself.!end

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